2
Random E-mails 2
Posted by Edwin Kim
on
4/06/2009 02:06:00 PM
~Jokes~
1.
This is a hoarding Jet Airways put at a busy road in Mumbai (bandra road )
SEE WHAT HAPPENED NEXT ………
AFTER A FEW DAYS ...
and FINALLY ...
the most happening……
Only in India : The last picture in Hindi (ph) means "stop now or the hoarding will collapse2.
At Georgia Tech, there were four sophomores taking Organic Chemistry. They did so well on all the quizzes, the mid-terms and labs, etc that each had an "A" so far for the semester. These four friends were so confident that the weekend before the finals, they decided to go up to the University of Virginia and party with some friends there. They had a great time, however after all the partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to GA Tech until Monday morning. Rather than rushing back to GA Tech to take the finals on monday morning itself, they decided to find their professor after the finals and explain to him why they missed the exam, in hopes that the professor would let them retake the test. They explained that they had gone to UVA for the weekend to group study with some friends, but unfortunately, they had a flat tire on the way back, didn't have a spare and couldn't get help for a long time. As a result, they missed the finals. The professor thought it over and then agreed they could make up the finals the following day. The guys were elated and relieved.
They studied that night and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them. He placed them in separate rooms and handed each of them a test booklet, and told them to begin. They looked at the first question, worth five points, something simple like free radical formation. "Cool", they all thought at the same time, each one in his separate room, "This is going to be easy!" Each finished the first question and then turned the page.
On the second page was written:- (For 95 points): Which tire?
Ahahahahaha. wtf. XD
3.
Ah Beng bought a new mobile.
He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said, 'My Mobile No. has changed.
Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610'
====================================
Ah Beng : I am a Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend: Really, what is he studying.
Ah Beng: No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.
==========================================
Ah Beng : Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
Ah Beng : Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.
===========================================
Ah Beng : If I die, will u remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Ah Beng : No, I'll also stay with your sister.
=========================================
Ah Beng : People consider me as a 'GOD'
Wife: How do you know??
Ah Beng : When I went to the Park today, everybody said, Oh GOD! U have come again.
===========================================
Ah Beng complained to the police: 'Sir, all items are missing,
except the TV in my house.'
Police: 'How the thief did not take TV?'
Ah Beng : 'I was watching TV news...'
=========================================
Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying 'Parking Fine'. He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole 'Thanks for complement.'
=============================================
How do you recognize Ah Beng in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.
===============================================
Once Ah Beng was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other. So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot
==================================================
Ah Beng in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and Says 'Hello, how did you know I was here?'
===================================================
He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said, 'My Mobile No. has changed.
Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610'
====================================
Ah Beng : I am a Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend: Really, what is he studying.
Ah Beng: No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.
==========================================
Ah Beng : Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
Ah Beng : Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.
===========================================
Ah Beng : If I die, will u remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Ah Beng : No, I'll also stay with your sister.
=========================================
Ah Beng : People consider me as a 'GOD'
Wife: How do you know??
Ah Beng : When I went to the Park today, everybody said, Oh GOD! U have come again.
===========================================
Ah Beng complained to the police: 'Sir, all items are missing,
except the TV in my house.'
Police: 'How the thief did not take TV?'
Ah Beng : 'I was watching TV news...'
=========================================
Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying 'Parking Fine'. He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole 'Thanks for complement.'
=============================================
How do you recognize Ah Beng in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.
===============================================
Once Ah Beng was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other. So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot
==================================================
Ah Beng in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and Says 'Hello, how did you know I was here?'
===================================================
~News~
1.
2.
Dear All,
My Dept secretary informed on this. Her cousin was detained in Bangkok for stealing a box of cigarettes in a duty-free shop in Bangkok International Airport
He had paid for chocolates and a carton of cigarettes. The cashier put a packet of smokes into his bag and he thought it was a free pack. He was arrested for shop-lifting and the Thai Police extortion price was RM30,000 for his release. He spent two nights in jail and paid RM50 for an air-cond cell, 200-300 baht for each visitor, and RM11,000 for his final release. The Police shared the money in front of his eyes. On top of that, he was charged in court and fined RM2,000 by the magistrate and handcuffed and escorted to his plane. His passport was stamped "Thief". While there, his relatives requested help from the Malaysian Embassy and was told that they are helpless, as M'sians are victimised similarly daily and letters and phone-calls to the Thai Authorities are ignored.
He shared a cell with a Singaporean the 1st night who paid RM60,000 for his release. The 2nd night was an Indian national who paid USD70,000.
Mind you this is not in a shag downtown Bangkok but in a duty free shop in Bangkok 's Int'l Airport .
Wasn't sure if this is true, just in case, prevention is better than cure!!
Man Almost Loses Penis Humping Steel Bench
Last night in Hong Kong , the police received a disturbing call from a man in trouble.
Xing, a 41 year-old man, was calling from LanTian park in the middle of the night. The lonely and disturbed man had apparently thought it would be fun to have sex with one of the steel sit-up benches around the park.
The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to satisfy himself. However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole.
He panicked and called the police to help him.
Xing, a 41 year-old man, was calling from LanTian park in the middle of the night. The lonely and disturbed man had apparently thought it would be fun to have sex with one of the steel sit-up benches around the park.
The bench has numerous small holes in it, which Xing used to attempt to satisfy himself. However, once he became aroused he found that he was stuck and could not get his penis out of the small hole.
He panicked and called the police to help him.
When police arrive they found Xian stuck face down where he had been stuck for some time.
When doctors arrived on the scene they tried to release some of the pressure by removing some of his blood, but the penis was so swollen that they ended up having to cut the entire bench free and take it, with Xian attached, to the hospital.
4 painful hours later, Doctors finally separated Xian from his bench.
Doctors stated that if he had been stuck for even an hour longer, they would have had to remove his penis.
2.
Dear All,
My Dept secretary informed on this. Her cousin was detained in Bangkok for stealing a box of cigarettes in a duty-free shop in Bangkok International Airport
He had paid for chocolates and a carton of cigarettes. The cashier put a packet of smokes into his bag and he thought it was a free pack. He was arrested for shop-lifting and the Thai Police extortion price was RM30,000 for his release. He spent two nights in jail and paid RM50 for an air-cond cell, 200-300 baht for each visitor, and RM11,000 for his final release. The Police shared the money in front of his eyes. On top of that, he was charged in court and fined RM2,000 by the magistrate and handcuffed and escorted to his plane. His passport was stamped "Thief". While there, his relatives requested help from the Malaysian Embassy and was told that they are helpless, as M'sians are victimised similarly daily and letters and phone-calls to the Thai Authorities are ignored.
He shared a cell with a Singaporean the 1st night who paid RM60,000 for his release. The 2nd night was an Indian national who paid USD70,000.
Mind you this is not in a shag downtown Bangkok but in a duty free shop in Bangkok 's Int'l Airport .
BE WARNED.
Wasn't sure if this is true, just in case, prevention is better than cure!!
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